Monday, November 30, 2009

B-day Backlog....

Soooo... as you may have noticed, we haven't posted "The Secret Language of Birthdays" for the past few days (let's face it, we were out for Thanksgiving). But... rather than just skip over the birthdays, we figured that we'd just post a whole bunch at one time. It's our way of saying, "Your birthday may have happened last week, but we love you anyway!"


Spirited, Loyal, Involved

If you were a sports car, you'd be a foreign Ferrari: unusual, a little flashy, and bound to be admired wherever you go. Deeply social, you're a fan of long conversations and need to be surrounded by people who understand and support you. You're an excellent friend; on the flip side, you have a tendency to hold grudges when people have betrayed your trust and make a scary--and outspoken--enemy.

+/-: You often wish you were more like foundation: blessed with the ability to blend. You often feel different from the people around you and wish to be more "normal." Understand that, really, there's no such thing, and embrace all of the qualities that make you you (and fabulous!).

Friend Match: You and a BFF are both ruled by the dynamic number 2, which means you like to be on the go 24/7. Remember to make quiet time with a low-key Cancer when it's time for R & R.

Love Match: You love to debate, and you need a guy who won't be intimidated when you defeat him point-by-point in an argument, like an uber-confident fellow Sagittarius who's a big fan of long convos.

Best color: Aqua
Star match: Katherine Heigl
Best vacation spot: New York City (just like you, the city never sleeps)


Constant, Thorough, Accomplished

If life is a highway, you're a cross-country truck driver: all about the long haul. You've got the patience and persistence to pursue your goals no matter what the obstacles, and look for friends who share your desire to succeed. Though you have a ton of energy you come across as cool, quiet, and reserved. You enjoy being alone but also have the capacity for deep and unwavering attachment, so make sure the person's worth it before offering a lift.

+/-: You're a true perfectionist, and are always painstakingly careful about what you do and say. Reality check: unlike The Hills, life is unscripted, so let loose and allow your unregulated side to shine.

Friend Match: A Gemini is always going through ups and downs, and you'll be there no matter what the weather. In return, she can help you loosen up and laugh at yourself when things take a downturn in your life.

Love Match: When you like someone, you refuse to see the negatives in him. But if an Aries is keeping you jumping through hoops, it's time to call off the circus. A loyalty-minded Leo will be the perfect remedy for the drama.

Best accessory: Life list (As far as you’re concerned, having a goal doesn’t count if it’s not written down.)
Best job: Novelist
Star match: Christina Applegate


Interesting, Free-Spirited, Unique

You're just like the smell of gasoline: love you or hate you, you're 100 percent unique. Deeply creative, you do things in your own way and at your own speed, but there's no doubt that you make things happen. You're curious and inventive but are blessed with a practical side that keeps your ideas grounded in real life, and are always working to find a balance between your imaginative and down-to-earth sides.

+/-: It's cool that you don’t care what other people think. But you may play better with others than you know. You'll never know whether people understand you unless you're willing to share your thoughts with them!

Friend Match: You're drawn to a Pisces BFF because of the unusual, intuitive, and individualistic way that you both see the world. And who else will spend an entire afternoon finger-painting your walls?

Love Match: It’s hard for you to be in a relationship because you’re so independent. Look for a guy who will give you space to do your own thing, like a Cancer who values privacy or a Sagittarius who's always on the move.

Best accessory: Sketchpad
Best job: Inventor
Star match: Natasha Bedingfield


Intuitive, Quick, Impulsive

If you were a line dance, you'd be the Electric Slide. If you're not the one creating the drama, you'll be in the middle of it faster than you can say, "Oh, no, she didn't." Spontaneous, fun-loving, and full of more energy than a twelve-pack of Red Bull, you're so busy bouncing off the walls you often don't notice you're getting battered. You need to take some time for R & R to avoid periods of anger and frustration.

+/-: Your whirlwind energy--and the tantrums that accompany it--can cause more damage than hurricane season in Florida. You need the stabilizing influence of close friends and family, so lean on them for help (and learn to say, I'm sorry.)

Friend Match: Pair up with a Leo: She has just as much energy as you do, but her steadiness and optimism means she never goes through periods of boom and bust and can help you find stability.

Love Match: In your case laughter really is the best medecine, so you'll know it's love when a class clown Aries keeps you in stitches (even when you're doing--blech--dissections in science class).

Best color: Magenta
Best vacation spot: Club in Ibiza
Style icon: Mary-Kate Olsen


Profound, Natural, Sensitive

If you were an old TV show, you'd be the Lone Ranger. You’re super smart, but school still feels like a seven-hour-a-day prison sentence to you. You’d much rather be learning on your own terms, and your desire for independence extends to every area of your life. Although you have a sharp and spot-on sense of humor, you often come across to others as serious and even intimidating.

+/-: You have a naturally logical mind and are quick to pick an argument to shreds when it isn't up to par. But you don't always hold yourself to the same standards, so before you start throwing stones, make sure you're not sitting in the middle of a house of glass.

Friend Match: You find a natural counterpart in the logically minded, diplomatic, and sweet-tempered Libra. But stay close to the silly influence of a goofball Aries who will help keep things light.

Love Match: You come across as snobby when in fact you're just private. You’ve got a lot in common with a Cancer in your class--he's just as introspective as you are--but somebody has to make the first move, so try breaking out of your let-him-come-to-me routine.

Best hobby: Book club
Best job: Medical researcher
Best style: Classic


Challenging, Dynamic, Influential

You should be an elevator operator, because you're always pushing buttons. Energetic, smart, and opinionated, you're always provoking others with your unusual ideas, unflinching honesty, and in-your-face attitude. Nothing infuriates you more than liars and fakes, and though some people may find you intimidating, everyone has to respect you for always speaking the truth and speaking your mind.

+/-: It’s great that you’re not afraid to express yourself. But there are times when you should reserve judgment, like when your BFF tells you she’s thinking of joining the cheerleading squad. Your job as a friend is to be supportive, not critical.

Friend Match: A Libra BFF is super patient, but even she'll get fed up if you don't stop picking fights. Take a lesson from her cool-as-a-cucumber demeanor and chill.

Love Match: You should come with a big FRAGILE sign, because people better handle you with care. Your tendency to explode means you need a guy who's not going to press the detonator, like an Aquarius who doesn't mind admitting when he's wrong.

Best color: Emerald
Best date: Day at the beach
Best hobby: Lit Mag


Thorough, Funny, Dynamic

Your spirit animal should be a tiger, because when it comes to getting what you want, you always know just when to pounce. Patient and hard working, you also possess an intuitive side that means you can sense when to act. You know how to do a lot with a little, so whether you're whipping up a new outfit from an old tank top or turning a pair of jeans into a pillow covering, you're always making the most of what's given to you.

+/-: You like to be in control of everything from your social calendar (planned a month in advance) to your burger toppings (extra ketchup, absolutely no onions). Take a lesson from cotton and loosen up.

Friend Match: You and a Virgo share a love of matching stationary sets and spotlessly clean bedrooms, but for sheer giggly fun and a mellowing influence, go ahead and send a Gemini a friend request.

Love Match: A mischievous Aries tries to seduce you with charm, but you respond better to openness and honesty. Look for a Sagittarius who'll be willing to spill--and share--his soul.

Best color: Silver
Star match: Kaley Cuoco
Best vacation spot: Cancun

Monday, November 23, 2009

We've had a request for some November 22nd b-day goodies...

Soooo... here you go! We're not ones to disappoint our readers :)


Protective, Persuasive, Thoughtful

If you were a national monument you'd be Philadelphia's Liberty Bell: all about freedom. Strong-willed and very independent, you demand the right to make your own choices and feel frustrated when people (like, ahem, your parents) try to impose limits on what you can do. Your friends respect your take-me-as-I-am attitude: you're never afraid to be 100 percent yourself.

+/-: It’s fantastic that you’ve got such a fighting spirit and great that you're such a protective friend, but don’t be so quick to jump into the front lines. Pick your battles, and don't necessarily think that your friends can't--or won't--stand up for themselves.

Friend Match: You and a super sweet Virgo are just like freshly baked bread: you're the hard exterior, she's the mushy soft inside. Together, a perfect pairing.

Love Match: If there's one thing you can't stand it's when a guy feels like he has the right to tell you what to do, so definitely stay away from bossy Taurus and look for a more easygoing Aries.

Best accessory: Combat boots
Star match: Scarlett Johansson
Best vacation spot: Castle in Scotland

P.S. Pardon the retroactive posting, but we don't ordinarily post weekend b-days. Today, however, is an exception.

11/23 -- Your birthday is the first school day of Thanksgiving week?

Talk about a double dose of excitement. How can you not be filled with eager anticipation? Between the way that your awesome friends decorated your locker, brought you b-day balloons, and showered you with "Happy Birthdays" and the the almost-upon-us, it's-so-close-you-can-feel-it-in-your-fingers-and-toes Thanksgiving break, things are good :)


Individualistic, Free-spirited, Humorous

If you were a catch phrase, you'd be: Prove it to me. You never follow rules just because someone says you should; from an early age you gave your parents grief because you refused to accept their because-I-said-so argument. Sharp witted and independent, in general you don't care what other people think but can ironically be super sensitive about certain lingering insecurities (and quick to take offense).

+/-: You're just like the filling in an Oreo cookie: always in the middle of something. Try and cultivate a thicker skin when it comes to the issues that get you really riled up.

Friend Match: You admire a Pisces for her inventive fashion sense and I-don't-care attitude and she admires you for always saying what you mean. Don't be afraid to let her help you tap into your creative side.

Love Match: You've got a great sense of humor, so you should be looking for a guy who can laugh at himself. A fun-loving Aries isn't afraid to make a fool out of himself and can help you loosen up when you're feeling uptight.

Best date: Jet skiing
Star match: Miley Cyrus
Best style: Grunge

Speaking of your overwhelming awesomeness, Miley Cyrus -- SERIOUSLY? I'd love to share a b-day with her. "Party in the USA" is just about the most addictive song in the last five years. We literally sing it around the office. No joke.

Friday, November 20, 2009

Friday, November 20th -- if only you were born one week later...

You'd have off on your birthday!!!

That's not saying that your b-day isn't special (of course, it is!), it's just saying that it's preferable for your birthday to involve sleeping late, pumpkin bread, and gifts that your overzealous father picked up for you (and by for you, I mean for your house -- I'm talking flat screen TVs and whatnot -- but that you appropriate for your own needs because well, a girl's gotta find out that Heidi and co. crowned Irina the new queen of Project Runway in HD. Heck, those designs just look so much more vivid at 50 inches -- wouldn't you say?).

Still, for those of you born on November 20th, take heart. At least you still have the long weekend to look forward to :) Think of it as an entire week of awesomeness!


Sensitive, Plucky, Faithful

You should have been a boxing champion, because you're a natural born fighter. Independent-minded and truly one-of-a-kind, you do your own thing and don't worry about what other people think. You act out sometimes against your 'rents (do they really think 9 o'clock is an acceptable curfew?), but the truth is you're extremely loyal to your fam and and always willing to do battle for the people close to you.

+/-: You've got a biting sense of humor that keeps your friends rolling in the aisles. But not everyone is happy to be the punch line of one of your jokes, so be sensitive to other people's feelings when you're about to break out the scathing stand-up routine.

Friend Match: You’re ruled by the number 2, so you can be a little over-sensitive sometimes. An earth-sign friend will keep you grounded and remind you to pick your battles.

Love Match: You're often attracted to bad boy Aries and flaky-as-pie-crust Gemini, but do you really want a guy who will always keep you guessing? An individualistic and confident Scorpio will keep things interesting without playing games.

Best pet: Jack Russell Terrier
Best job: Op-Ed columnist
Theme song: Underdog – Jonas Brothers

Thursday, November 19, 2009

THE DAILY BEAST calls VAMPIRE ACADEMY "the heir to the Twilight throne"

and Razorbill throws a (metaphorical) party...

We especially love the part where they talk about how awesome Rose is (since -- ya know -- we totally agree).

November 19th Birthdays in the House!!!!


Convincing, Strong, Confident

If you had a motto, it would be: Vive La Revolution! You're all about change and improvement, but you’re not just a girl with big ideas; your take-charge attitude and practical outlook means you find a way to make your dreams a reality. Even if your friends aren’t sure about taking a stand, you’ll persuade them to play a part. Playful, trendy, and fun-loving, you take a break from changing the world to let the good times roll.

+/-: If you’ve got something to say, you’re not the type to keep it under wraps. But sometimes it really is best to be seen but not heard--like during your history final exam, for example.

Friend Match: A BFF ruled by the erratic planet Mercury changes her mind practically every second and is always turning to you for advice. Despite her flakiness, her energy and enthusiasm makes her a perfect partner when it's time to fight the good fight (uh, curfew).

Love Match: You’re a family-oriented girl so you hate it when guys talk smack about their sibs. Look for a quiet and honest Cancer who values the nest as much as you, without being a momma's boy.

Best accessory: Megaphone
Best date: Staying in and watching a movie
Star match: Jodie Foster

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Did I mention that BETRAYALS is out?

No, I guess I didn't. But, yep, you heard right. Betrayals, book two of the Strange Angels series by Lili St. Crow, finally hit stores yesterday. If you're just dying to find out what happens to Dru, Graves, and the rest of the gang (that word feels so inappropriate for a book like this), you know what to do!

P.S. In case you're confused about what I mean by "you know what to do," the answer is: buy the book!!!!

November 18th B-Days -- Stand Up and Shout! (or just pop in some Taylor Swift...)


Intuitive, Emotional, Social

You should be an aerobics instructor, because you've got energy to burn. Though you may come across as totally together, your thoughts and emotions race faster than an Olympic sprinter and you're always looking for new ways to stay stimulated. Highly social, you love to be the center of attention. You definitely play hard, but work hard? Not so much. Fortunately, your creativity and vision allows you to succeed anyway.

+/-: You have spot-on intuition, so learn to listen and trust your gut instincts. If you get the feeling that the new cutie in class has some kind of shady secret, you're probably right, so make Mystery Man history.

Friend Match: You’ve got a ton of people vying for a spot in your inner circle. You love all the admiration, but you also know what really matters is the kind of old-school loyalty you get from a Leo BFF.

Love Match: You have a ton of different sides to you--from social butterfly to dirt bike enthusiast to tree-hugger--and it may seem like a get-what-you-see Taurus is too boring for you. But don't underestimate the power of a dude you can depend on. Bonus? His excellent hugs.

Best job: Fashion photographer
Theme song: Tied Together With a Smile – Taylor Swift
Best vacation spot: Swiss Alps

P.S. I'm a little jealous of your theme song. I LOVE Taylor Swift. I was totally rocking out (and by rocking out, I mean calmly beep-bopping) on the subway to "Fearless" this morning. I'd also recommend that if you ever commute to work on NJ Transit (which -- to be frank -- I'd suggest not doing at all, but assuming you have no choice...), you pop in some Taylor. Her music is the perfect antidote to the pure pandemonium that is public transportation :)

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

N-O-V-E-M-B-E-R Go Go November 17th!!!!


Mediating, Helpful, Responsible

If you were a song, you'd be Bridge Over Troubled Water--you're always helping to smooth things over, join two sides, and establish a connection between opposite positions. You can't stand disagreements or drama, and you often act as the glue that holds your social network together, negotiating compromise between your two squabbling sibs or playing matchmaker for your BFF.

+/-: You pride yourself on your ability to stay super calm under pressure, but sometimes the fact that you always keep your cool makes you seem like a straight-up ice queen. Learn to be more emotionally open.

Friend Match: You can help resolve disputes between a Type A Virgo pre-planner and a play-it-by-ear Gemini. Just be sure that in return you get the support you need.

Love Match: You're so used to talking and thinking about other people, it can be hard for you to dish about yourself. A perceptive and thoughtful Pisces wants to know more about you, not your fifty best friends, so try focusing the conversation on the things that get you pumped.

Best color: Tan
Best date: Poetry slam Best hobby: Model UN

P.S. A belated happy birthday to Briana (who posted yesterday)!!!!

Monday, November 16, 2009

Just saying...

Publisher's Weekly thinks The Betrayal of Natalie Hargrove is "deliciously twisted." So do we....

November 16th -- It's Birthday Time!


Authoritative, Effective, Understanding

If you were a reality TV show, you would be Top Chef: a natural leader, your commanding presence means you always bring the heat (and if other people don't like it, they can get out of the kitchen). You have tendencies to rebel against your parents and teachers largely because you like to be the on in control, but you're definitely no dictator. Part of what makes you such a great leader is your ability to listen.

+/-: Don't forget the little people on your quest for success. Give credit--and accept help--when it's due. You may have come up with the Spanish bullfighting theme for homecoming, but make sure to shout out all the peeps who helped transform the gym into an arena.

Friend Match: You know that a super-supportive Cancer friend is always there for you--but how about putting her to use? You have a tendency to deny it when you're feeling down. Instead, try opening up.

Love Match: When it comes to relationships, you wear the pants--until a Leo ruled by the number 1 throws you for a loop. A little competition will keep things interesting, but both of you must learn to compromise.

Best job: Movie producer
Star match: Maggie Gyllenhaal
Best vacation spot: India

Friday, November 13, 2009

The Betrayal of Natalie Hargrove -- in stores NOW!!!


This just came out yesterday. And we have to say that Natalie is so deliciously full of herself. LOVE IT.

Friday the 13th...


Involved, Knowledgeable, Spiritual

You should be a newspaper, because you've always got something to say about what's going on the world. Curious and inquisitive, you've got the gossip on everything that goes down at school, from the politics of popularity to the most recent makeups and breakups, and you're never afraid to voice your opinion. But when it comes to self-knowlegde you can be surprisingly thin, which means you've been accused of being superficial.

+/-: There may be an "I" in listening, but if you keep bogarting the conversation every time your BFF wants to vent you'll discover that the only I that will apply to you is the one in the word ditched. Zip your lips once in a while and let your friends speak.

Friend Match: Your girlfriends had better share a love of drama; there's nothing you like better than a gossip session. Just be sure to include a bluntly honest Sagittarius who will tell you when it's time to hush up.

Love Match: If it seems like you're always attracting guys for the wrong reasons, maybe it's because you've been playing dumb. You can't truly open up until you know yourself better (not even to a smart fellow-Scorpio who's your perfect match).

Best color: Baby blue
Best style: Eurotrash
Theme song: Dirty Little Secret – All American Rejects

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

We're gonna party like it's... YOUR birthday!


Persuasive, Colorful, Energetic

If you were a vegetable, you'd be a carrot: most of what you've got going on is happening underground. Although you come across as cheerful and together, you've got hidden depths of feeling and thought that rarely get displayed. Powerful and driven, you like to control not just the way you appear to others but the people and things that are close to you. You have a need to be at the center of your group and tend to take charge.

+/-: Remember that what doesn't bend, breaks. It's okay to ask for what you want but if life throws you a curve ball, learn to take a swing instead of stalking out of the game.

Friend Match: Don't feel you have to act 100% together just to keep the admiration and loyalty of your peeps. True friends should want you to open up no matter what you're feeling, so don't be afraid to open up to a sensitive Pisces when things aren't going your way.

Love Match: You like to be admired from afar, but a second a guy gets too close you push him away. Newsflash: losing control is the best part, so go all in for the smoldering Scorpio who catches your eye.

Best color: Red
Best hobby: Photography
Star match: Demi Moore

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Write to me and (maybe) I'll send you a galley!

We have some extra galleys of the New York Times Bestseller I am a Genius of Unspeakable Evil and I Want to be Your Class President around the office. Write to me at and I might just send you one. And if you're really nice, I may even include an unnamed galley. That's how generous I'm feeling :)

As a reminder, this is the book that Jon Stewart compared to War and Peace (and wolves and babies and...). Well now I'm just confusing myself. Seriously though -- you'd be the polar opposite of a genius if you don't take me up on this offer. In fact, let's play a game. It's like Mad Libs. People who have not yet read this book and do not write to me to request a galley are ______. I can think of a few ideas. How about you?

November 10th B-day Excitement


Creative, Self-Assured, Magnetic

The ruling symbol of November 10th is the butterfly, because those born on this day are all about metamorphosis. Your change isn't just personal, however: creative and productive, you are able to transform the materials around you into something fabulous and new (like when you turned an old pair of jeans into a handbag). A social butterfly (what else?), people are attracted to your off-beat sensibility and your confidence.

+/-: Although friends flock to you, you have a tendency to view them as audience members in the One Woman Theater of You. Cultivate your listening skills and learn to be more sensitive to others' needs.

Friend Match: You definitely march to the beat of your own drummer, but a Cancer friend is totally feeling your rhythm. And because she's super loyal, she won’t blab to all your other peeps about your lucky stuffed bear or tendency to put ketchup on everything.

Love Match: You can't stand people who always stick to the same old routine, so a Sagittarius--ruled by themes of movement, travel, and change--will share your love of exploration and help to keep things fresh.

Best accessory: Sewing kit
Best job: Interior designer
Star match: Brittany Murphy

Monday, November 9, 2009

New York Times Bestseller List -- Total Domination or Bust!!!

Sooo... like a certain E-Villll genius we know, we at Razorbill are also bent on world domination. Well, not world domination per se, but domination of a different kind. We're bent on dominating the New York Times Children's Bestseller List. And as you can see, we are well on our way....

Hah hah hah ha ha... Hah hah hah ha ha... (that's my attempt at transcribing an evil cackle)

If you check the list, there are a bunch of other books (five to be exact) listed here, but we're going to ignore those for now....

This marks Thirteen Reasons Why's one-year anniversary on the Bestseller list. Presents are accepted. No, not really. Well, ahem, if you're sneaky...

Let's welcome I am a Genius of Unspeakable Evil and I Want to be Your Class President to the list!!! I'd suggest that you pick up a copy immediately if you do not want Oliver Watson to seek vengeance against you and your first born. And yes -- in case you're curious -- Oliver is very much capable of holding a grudge. Best to appease him while you can...

And finally, Richelle, we love you. We will always love you. Well, not always because that would make us truly E-Villll, and we're much more into being wicked than we are into being undead -- if you catch our meaning.

Check out the New York Times website for more information about the list:

If you were born on November 9th...


Daring, Open, Sporty

You're just like a triple fudge sundae with whipped cream and hot fudge sauce: all about indulgence. Temptation is a major theme in the lives of those born on November 9th, and you're always giving in to the here and now pleasures with very little thought for the tomorrow consequences. Spontaneous and fun-loving, you welcome challenges and new experience.

+/-: You’re always out to have a good time, but because your danger meter is slightly off-kilter don't always realize that what you're doing is risky. Learn to tune in to your inner voice when you're having second thoughts about swimming in the mall fountain.

Friend Match: A Virgo BFF has a good sense of when to pull the plug on your big ideas (like when they're going to get you grounded), while a Gemini helps encourage your giggly, silly side.

Love Match: Don't let a sun-ruled guy with an outsized ego pull you into his orbit. You deserve to be the queen of your own universe, so choose a confident and devoted Taurus who will treat you like one.

Best hobby: Cheerleading
Star match: Nikki Blonsky
Best style: Boho-chic

P.S. So jealous that your "star match" is Nikki Blonsky. Loved her in Hairspray. Since then, eh... But, Hairspray! "Good Morning Baltimore," "Welcome to the 60s," "You Can't Stop the Beat" = good stuff.

Friday, November 6, 2009

Thank God It's Friday (and Your Birthday)!!!!


Energetic, Stimulating, Optimistic

You should be a stairclimber, because you're all about stepping it up. You've got energy that's more infectious than the flu, and people can't help but be charmed and motivated when you're around, which is why you're the go-to girl for chairing up the social committee or organizing Earth Day. More bubbly than champagne and super self-confident, you can't stand the word "no," and are driven to succeed.

+/-: You're a whirlwind of activity, always blasting from one obligation to another. But unless you learn how to press pause once in a while you're bound to do damage to both yourself and your close relationships.

Friend Match: When it comes to friends, your philosophy is the more the merrier. But for someone to lean on when you're not feeling like the life of the party, stick with a quiet, loyal Virgo.

Love Match: It's great that you're so ambitious, but maybe one of your goals should be to let yourself really fall for someone. An uber-romantic Scorpio will help you forget about deadlines and school drama for a while.

Best date: Amusement park
Best hobby: What don’t you do?
Star match: Rebecca Romijn

Thursday, November 5, 2009

The Secret Language of November 5th


Knowledgeable, Stubborn, Realistic

If you were a TV show, you'd be the Discovery Channel's Mythbusters: an ultra-realist, you're obsessed with uncovering the truth and can't stand liars, braggers, or flakes. You've got a sharp eye for scams (and slime ball guys) and your friends depend on you to make the right choice in every situation. Courageous and unafraid of confrontation, you always stand up for what you believe in.

+/-: You mess around in other people's private business so much, you should be a Private Investigator. Focus on your own issues and leave the snooping to the professionals, otherwise your fed-up friends are going to put you out of business.

Friend Match: Your Cancer BFF can be super shy, which is why you're always sticking up for her. The tradeoff? Her sweetness and loyalty means you always have someone to share your stories with.

Love Match: A diligent Sagittarius will share your love of truth and learning, so if you're looking for hours and hours of deep conversation--and someone who won't break his promises--look no further.

Best accessory: Library card
Best color: Salmon
Best job: District attorney

Tuesday, November 3, 2009


Wait, I'm technically not allowed to say that. Well, eh.... I just did! And why, you ask, is November 3rd the greatest birthday to ever exist? Why is it one birthday to rule them all? Why -- you must know. Isn't it just obvious?

It's MY birthday. That's right -- mine. And I don't mean Razorbill's. I mean the birthday of the person that updates this blog. Me.

Soooooo in view of that BIG reveal, let's play a little game, shall we? I'll post the text from THE SECRET LANGUAGE OF BIRTHDAYS as usual, and then we'll evaluate how it applies to me. Here we go!!!

P.S. Anything that's a different color means I wrote it. So, please -- DO NOT THINK THAT THE COLORED TEXT IS FROM THE BOOK. It isn't. It's from my brain.

NOVEMBER 3 (Again, quick reminder -- best birthday EVER!!!!)

Persistent (I am like a dog with a bone between its teeth), Concentrated (Going to assume that this doesn't refer to orange juice, and say that when I'm focused on something, watch out! First of all, you're just not going to be able to get my attention. Plus, I kinda make a face. It's sort of like my tongue goes limp and my mouth is slightly agape. No joke.), Triumphant (I've beat virtually every person I've ever played Connect 4 against. Also, checkers.)

If you were a game, you would be chess, because you're all about thinking three moves ahead (Again, see the Connect 4 reference. Also, my resume). Persistent and focused, you keep your calm under pressure and know how to wait. But you're not a procrastinator (Yeah, uh-huh, not a procrastinator... right). When the time is right, you work passionately and energetically (Seriously. I have a ridiculous amount of energy. Thank you copious amounts of Diet Coke). Everyone knows not to argue with you; nothing gets under your skin, and even when you're temper's burning you stay as cool as ice (Honestly, I think I have an internal body thermostat kinda problem. Gloves are a necessity).

+/-: You're so concentrated you're just like orange juice from a can (There we go -- another OJ reference), but when it comes to your feelings, you've got a serious block. Give your heart a de-freeze and learn how to express yourself emotionally (Oh, past lovers how you've scorned me and left me an emotional basketcase. Tsk. Tsk).

Friend Match: Sometimes your sarcasm can get out of hand (For me, it's actually more like an undercurrent of cynicism masked by a "concentrated" -- haha -- effort to remain optimistic). A straightforward, sensitive Cancer will always tell you when to lay off the abuse--and she'll help you figure out what's really got you mad.

Love Match: You do not like to lose, and that goes for your heart, too (You've got me. Losing is out of the question. I'm in it to win it. And by win it, I mean put a freakin' ring on it... though not yet. How about like three years from now? I'm talking to you, mysterious loverboy who I haven't met yet). You’re not the type to give your affection away freely, but let an expressive and artistic Pisces show you how to open up.

Best color: Lilac
Best hobby: Yoga (I recently started taking Bikram. The room is literally 105 degrees, and it makes me sweat more than I've ever sweat in my entire life. We're talking about you do not want to be around me kinda sweating. Like, stay away. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200 dollars. Do not touch me with a ten foot pole sweating.)
Best style: Haute couture (If anyone would like to buy me some, I'd be game.)

So, there it is -- my evaluation of today's birthday insights. How does your birthday experience stack up???

Monday, November 2, 2009

You say it's your birthday!!! You wanna have a good time... again :)


Influential, Powerful, Adaptable

You’re like a chameleon in reverse: you'd rather make the world adjust its colors than try and blend in with the world. A social powerhouse, you're a trendsetter and a dynamo at making over everything from your BFF's wardrobe to your math teacher's attitude (who knew he could smile?). You have a tremendous impact on the people around you, giving you the power to transform situations according to your will.

+/-: Change freaks some people out, but not you. When opportunity knocks, you roll out the welcome mat. But it's important to stick with your commitments, so remember you don’t always have to open the door.

Friend Match: You’ve got the energy of Times Square on New Year's, but sometimes you just need to chill. That’s when you should seek out a laid-back Libra, who’ll keep you from stressing out too much.

Love Match: Your attention span barely carries you through a movie, so there's no chance of committing to just one guy. But watch out for a taste of your own medicine du flakiness in a gorgeous Mercury-ruled Gemini who will have you wishing for a little one-on-one time.

Best color: Forest green
Best date: House party with mutual friends
Best job: Stylist